We don’t send regular emails, we send cool emails We’ll send you an email once a week with only the best stuff we put out. Email me yours at headpro betcheslovethis. I think I fucked a homeless guy? So it was toward the end of the night and I was a bit white girl wasted. My friend convinced me that we should get some halal food before catching the subway back to school. While waiting in line we met what I thought was this cute southern Heath Ledger type. Long story short I brought him home to my dorm room.
‘Tinder Nightmares’ Reveal The Most Awkward (And Hilarious) Parts Of Online Dating
Scientists have discovered that when dung beetles roll their balls of animal feces at night, they navigate by looking at the Milky Way! No, they took a bunch of dung beetles to a planetarium, where they let them see different simulated night skies: Dung beetles who can see the stars specifically the Milky Way roll their poo-balls in fairly straight lines. I take great comfort from this information, because I basically spend all my time rolling around a big ball of poo called My Life.
1. “I had been hooking up with one of my guy friends for a while, and one night, we both met up at the bar and were really drunk, so we went back to my dorm.
Everyone gets nervous on first dates. There are a lot of questions we ask ourselves in advance: Will we hook up? Will I do or say something so stupid and embarrassing that I am haunted by shame for the rest of my life? But ask no more. The web is replete with first date stories; we excavated Reddit to find the sweetest, funniest, goofiest, weirdest – in a word, best – ones, as related by users.
Sometimes, everything really does work out for the best. A guy calling himself ignewtons had a great idea for an inexpensive time out on the town. I took her to an alpaca farm after she said thought they were the cutest thangsss. After sweet talking the farm owner, he let us walk into the barn where all the lil guys overcame their initial trepidation and then surrounded us in the most adorable way possible.
Kris Kross — Is Wiggity Wiggity Wiggity BACK!
Strange Stories , views 1The robber who tried to break into a house and ended up as a sexual slave for 3 days A Russian robber broke into the salon of year-old hairdresser who was armed with significant martial arts training. The woman held the year-old armed robber captive for two days as her personal sex slave. He was gagged, kept handcuffed to a radiator with pink furry handcuffs , and allegedly fed Viagra before being forced into intercourse with the woman on multiple occasions.
After approximately 48 hours of punishment, the man was released from his prison, heading straight to the hospital for treatment for a torn frenulum.
Aug 30, · Really only one sticks out in my head. When I was about 17, I was at a party, drunk and tripping on shrooms. This girl that was sober wanted to hook up.. so we went into the room, and my friend and another girl were in there hooking up, so we started doing the same thing on the same bed.
You, circa January 1: But it is a wide and varied survey that offers something for every taste, from absurdist novels to bawdy memoirs to essays satirizing our human condition. In other words, consider these titles a brief reprieve from a news cycle that tends to prize the tragic over the comic. And if you’re looking for Hemingway and Fitzgerald discussing a “matter of measurements,” well, that’s in there, too. Reilly, a pre-Internet troll extraordinaire.
This memoir is a great read for anyone who wants to nerd out and learn about writing, drinking or Hemingway’s nostalgia for his time in Paris. Plenty of laughs too, often at the expense of F. Hemingway, oozing supercilious masculinity, has no qualms about disparaging his literary frenemy or portraying Zelda — F. Scott’s wife — as an odious succubus.
She said it was a matter of measurements. I have never felt the same since she said that and I have to know truly. We came back into the room and sat down at the table.
Best First Date Stories
Short Pirate Jokes 1. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? An arm and a leg. What do you call a pirate that skips class?
Nov 19, · Read this OMG reader hook-up confession, and then send your own to [email protected] My boyfriend and I were having sex for the very first time a few nights ago. Since it was our first time, he made sure I was really comfortable and .
He’s second from right. Tix on sale this Friday! If you like podcasts, books, gossip, and gay stuff, and you do not already listen to Food 4 Thot, you’ve got to get on it. In a world where those conversations were so often separated, where could one get both? I listened to my first episode on a ferry. Immediately I was enamored of Tommy Pico’s voice.
I loved his timbre, the ideas he was expressing, his givenness to laughter, to puns, to associative leaps, but maybe I was predisposed to liking him because I’d read about him in The Stranger.
I Got the Hook Up
Belle Vierge Those are adorable. Christopher Witmer I agree. This swimwear is much, much better than most. Changing your surroundings and activities does not change the weakness of your heart. If it is immodest downtown, or at church, or wherever, it is immodest anywhere in public.
Since all eyes were on the royal wedding yesterday, SNL host Tina Fey and the cast had to go there – and they did, following Mikey Day’s Prince Harry as he filmed the official wedding video at 2 am.
I mean come on, everyone has had an awkward or just plain funny sex moment at some point in time. Therefore, last year I reached out to my peers to share their stories. The following are 14 of the most painful, or just downright hilarious, sexual encounters that have occurred within the past year. Then it turned out he talked to me in bed just like he talked to the dog.
I was so out of there. I wanted to make the move from his undies on to undies off but he stopped me and told me he had already finished earlier when we were just kissing. We froze and pretended to be asleep. But then she came back again and again. Turns out my mother has gotten minor food poisoning and we picked a very inconvenient time to do it. One night, I saw him at a party and chatted him up.
We got together later on and we were making out on his bed. I ignored it until he asked if I was okay. We turned on the light and there was blood pouring out of my nose. He tried to take it further, but I wasn’t having that.
The Best Funny Stories and Jokes
Jack Prelutsky, illustrated by: James Stevenson – Greenwillow Books, pages. The title, which is also the first line, sets the playful tone. Delightfully anti-authoritarian and anti-establishment, Prelutsky is the unexcelled master of word-playing nonsense.
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It is not always a happy story, either. There is some laughter, some tears, and a whole lot of sex. In other words, it is about real life. It is about the choices that young people make, and how those choices affect their lives. I guess that I should start at the beginning, since that’s where all good stories start. My name is Jackson King. I’m eighteen years old, and I’ve just graduated from high school. I live with my parents, and my little sister, Katie. I call her my little sister, but she’s actually eighteen too.
No, we aren’t twins. She is actually ten months younger than I am.
I met Robin Williams: Your stories of the comic legend
That is why many people opt to use a net instead. However, there is using a net, and then there is taking it one step further. Who would use a net in each hand when there is valuable space going to waste elsewhere on the boat? They are now a triple threat on the waters as they aim to get the biggest catch out there. Have you ever seen some of the monsters that lay deep beneath the water?!
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I probably do more embarrassing things in a day than most people do in a month. But everyone, and I mean everyone, has at least one brutally embarrassing, awkward, or cringe-worthy hookup story. I recently reached out to my peers to share their stories and they did not disappoint. The following are 12 of the most painful, or just downright hilarious, sexual encounters that I had the pleasure of hearing about.
All names have been changed to protect the privacy of those involved. Sophomore male A little back story: I was at a Christmas party with this girl that I was already friends with for a couple months and she wanted to use the bathroom in my room which I suggested. We got up there and started making out. Sophomore female Over the summer I had a short fling with a guy from work.
I went over his house and slept over. In the morning I really had to pee, so I tiptoed out of his room to the bathroom right across the hall. The door was cracked so I just pushed it open, and there was his dad
Alex’s family threw a Gatsby-themed fundraiser for autism awareness, everyone got mad at him for sleeping with Amanda, and Juliette continued her downward spiral into desperation, even as she tried to put on a brave front. Elsewhere, Chloe stirred up drama, Brandon asked out Madisson, and Kelsey and Garrett continued their exhausting relationship, which should have really ended by the dessert tray in Alex’s atrium.
Alex is coming for Kelsey whether she’s broken up or not.
Mar 30, · And forget the idea of chalking it up to healthy sexual experimentation—at this point, the opposite is true: “When students are expected to hook up with lots of people, doing so becomes dutiful.
Share ‘I’m new to this industry and I wanted my interview,’ Mariela said. Mariela Sanchez, shown in an undated file photo, just wanted an interview with the Moroccan-born rapper French agreed but only if he could interview Mariela first. Mariela said French booted the other girls from the room, took away her cell phone and her photographer friend was not allowed upstairs. Before taking her cell phone, French had her call him so he could have her number, Mariela said.
Mariela, shown in an undated file photo, told her colleagues on Matty In The Morning about French trying to hook up with her ‘It’s kind of weird that guys this famous are still thirsty for girls,’ Mariela said. French then suggested they move to his tour bus for the interview, the intern said. Mariela said the founder and CEO of Cocaine City Records promised to give her the interview and also pledged to fly her out to New York City whenever she wanted to see him. They were about to move to the hotel lobby but the rapper’s entourage quickly left the tour bus.
She told the rapper that she has morals and a lot to lose as she was just getting started in entertainment journalism.
College Students, It’s Time to End Hookup Culture
Basically ever since the Ancient Greeks began sharing oral histories of the sexual exploits of Zeus, Aphrodite, Poseidon et al. Below, we look at ten of our favorite recent-ish hook-up rumors about celebrities that include everything from butt stuff and barking to Greco-Roman wrestling and toe-sucking. One was an anecdote about the singer’s foiled attempts to piss on a woman he brought home who immediately left crying ; the other had Mayer whispering to a self-proclaimed super fan “Left me see your fucking butthole.
DMX’s answering machine is legendary According to a Redditor aptly named BobDolesPotato , he obtained rap legend DMX’s phone number from a friend of his roommate’s mom who slept with him — and his answering message was just him barking!!!
We all have our reasons for ending relationships – be they sound or not But these great stories from Reddit users simply take the cake!
Over a million users looking to hook up tonight! Join and get in on the action. Sometimes things go really well and other times things get a little funny. Slip ups, surprises, and confusion are all something you may deal with eventually, and your ability to laugh and learn will serve you well. We collected some of our members best sex dating stories and dating blunders. Enjoy the Hook up highlights. Hotel Horrors I met a hook up at a local hotel. It was a late check-in, but a room was available, or so we thought.
About 30 minutes after we checked in, plenty of time for us to get naked, a family used their key card to come into our room! Turns out the hotel double booked the room by accident.